Intervention
The old red cherry tree is gnarled, mottled with moss, and leans precariously to one side; mountain wind and seasonal temperament have had their way. I've climbed as high as I can go, slipped a bit; fog's draped a fine moist layer over everything. Young twigs sprout from older branches, their bright green leaves seem joyous; a reminder I used to be full of enthusiasm, eagerness. They scratch my cheek, I welcome the pain, the feeling. Her bark is so close to my face; like a mother's carress. Breath in her earthiness; recall as a child long walks through the woods. Mother named the flowers, trees, pointed out animals. Her favorite, the deer. Through tears I see a doe below. Wonder, "Is this a sign?", when far away an interrupted cry I hear. Realize it's mine. Open my hand. Let the empty rope fall.
by Margaret Bednar, June 10, 2019
This is for "dVerse Poets Pub - Prosery #1". A Flash Fiction story (a very short piece of prose telling a story) in 144 words or less. AND we must use the line "When far away an interrupted cry" which is from Robert Frost's poem "Acquainted with the Night" I used exactly 144 words.
The photo was taken from my bedroom window.
I invite you to listen to me read:
12 comments:
Oh, wow, the ending really has me questioning. Was the rope tied before it fell? Did the narrator hear the cry and change their mind before tying it? I love the details and descriptions here.
Changed it slightly to make it more clear as I didn't want it to end with death.
I love that photo and with the story like the intimacy with the tree and nature while soul searching. I also liked hearing you read it.
Jade Li@http://tao-talk.com
I liked the descriptive images you have in the story! The ending worked very well. The cry the doe and the sign from her mother. Nice!
An interesting, mysterious ending. But what i luv most about this piece is the poetic descriptions of nature and the character's connections
Thanks for dropping by to read mibe
Much❤✏❤🗒❤love
An instance, perhaps, when the reminders of presence are strong enough to keep one present. Well told, and I enjoyed the audio.
Lovely descriptive prose, nice enticement regarding the past, the child and the tree. I also like the notion that one can scream involuntarily; the rope, and it's ambiguity, not so much.
Glad she saw a sign that brought her back to hope.
I do love how you don't let us really know the purpose of being there... I can feel the sorrow but not until you let go of the rope I do understand the way you were saved by that cry
Very mysterious and enigmatic Margaret - engaging?
Sometimes the smallest thing can keep us from falling. (K)
I hope you don't mind, but this inspired:
https://rivrvlogr.com/2019/06/11/intervention/
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