Sunday, August 26, 2012

IGWRT's Sunday Challenge "Through Glass Eyes"

Photo courtesy of  Jaime Clark
Through Glass Eyes

Through glass eyes
unwaveringly
I see you.

My heart cold,
no longer green with envy.

Songless, I let go.

by Margaret Bednar

This is for Imaginary Garden with Real Toad's "A Mini-Challenge for Sunday - Extreme Close-Up.  The photography was provided by Jamie Clark and I also used her title for the photo as my inspiration for a poem (Thanks, Jaimie, hope you don't mind.)

The "marching orders" also consisted of writing a Shadorma: a poem in six lines, using a syllabic count of 3-5-3-3-7-5 per line.  And, lucky me, no rhyming.

Katydid's are easily heard, but not usually seen.  They "sing" to each other by rubbing their forewings together.

12 comments:

Mama Zen said...

Killer last line!

Marian said...

songless! wah.
bonus points for a five-syllable word :)

Kerry O'Connor said...

This really took me by surprise! It is such an original take on the picture: my cold heart no longer green with envy!

We thought this was a katydid but later discovered it was some kind of long-headed grasshopper - not one we have commonly seen.

hedgewitch said...

You really pair up words with image so they become one here, Margaret. And the end result is both sad and evocative.

Sherry Blue Sky said...

This is brilliant. Way to write a shadorma. Love the last line extra-much!

Mary said...

Beautiful!

Susie Clevenger said...

So beautifully sad...a broken heart song sang in six lines.

Susan said...

You found it to be wanting? Good take! But you will have to find that song again.

Sharp Little Pencil said...

Using the green of the katydid (grasshopper?) as the shade of jealous, great. Last line was a killer. Great addition to the prompt! Peace, Amy
http://sharplittlepencil.com/2012/08/26/screwed-over-again-a-shadorma/

Ella said...

Great job...I love how you tied in green with envy :D
Very clever!

Vicki Lane said...

Very lovely -- shadoma is a new one to me.

Green Speck said...

Amazing lines !!!