Monday, March 7, 2011

"The Roses' Oath" a Poem, 158-159/365


The Roses' Oath

Please say your heart's forever mine!
The roses' beauty makes an oath,
desire or love and sometimes both.
An open yellow questions growth
of loyalty and loves' sweet wine.
The roses' beauty makes an oath
Please say your heart's forever mine.

by Margaret Bednar, Art Happens 3-7-11

For one who loves (because I am lazy, I'm sure) free-verse this "Triolet" was a challenge for me and my very first quick attempt.  The pattern is described in One Stop Poetry's "One Stop Poetry Form" which is featured every Monday.  Please click on the sight to learn the counting (stresses) and rhyming structure.  (btw.. Ginnie! ... are my apostrophes correct? Grammar police, help! :)

I'm also submitting the above poem to "The March Challenge".  The prompt is:  nature.


The following close up is for "Macro Monday".  Can you smell the roses today?  :)

15 comments:

repressedsoul said...

You did a good job with this triolets, wow, the quality of writing today has been superb, notes on form are the iambs are precise, a lovely flow, and a nice old fashioned love theme. Great! Hope to see you next week also!

Regina said...

Pretty and wonderful words.

rmpWritings said...

quite beautiful. for someone who also love free-verse (or verse free of syllable count), i think you did a spectacular job.

i'm far from the grammar police, but since you asked, i believe you missed the first apostrophe on heart's (heart is) in line one.

LauraX said...

Just beautiful Margaret!

Tammie Lee said...

oh, i wish i could smell the roses
so lovely that your poem came along with your sweet photographs! I will have to check out these poetry links, thank you.

Patty Ann said...

Margaret, I just bought several books on writing poetry and am hoping to add more to my writing skills. I usually write freestyle, but want to work on some structure. I will have to check some of the sites that you follow. This looks like it was difficult to do! Love the success of the poem, and love the roses.

signed...bkm said...

What beautiful roses and triolet to go with them...I love them ..Yellow are my favorite..through I will not turn down any color of sweet roses....lovely...bkm

justine said...

beautiful beautiful rose shots especially the middle one, so much to look forward to when spring comes.

Margaret said...

RepressedSoul - Well, I must give One Stop Poetry much of the credit - I would never have given this a whirl. Yes, it will be fun to see if I can do this again! And thank you so much for your praise!

Regina & LauraX - :) Thank you for saying so!

mpWritings - LOL- I corrected my punctuation "gafaw" ASAP. Syllable counts aren't my favorite, but when I do pay some attention the that and they rhythm ... they end up being some of my favorites. :)

Tammie Lee - I thought the synchronization of photos & poetry challenges was rather nice! The roses didn't have much fragrance, but the oriental lilies I just photographed are wonderful smelling.

Patty Ann - I can't wait to see your efforts at poetry - I think you will do quite well - just tap in to that mother's heart and you will have plenty of material! Use rhymezone.com - it helps.

bkm - :) I too will never turn down flowers - I certainly take enough photos of them. I just took a zillion of my white, yellow and pink ornamental lilies. Stunning flowers... The triolet ended up being not too painful to do... might give it another whirl...

Justine -The middle one was taken as I walked by with camera in hand - not much planning. the others I had tripod and 2 second timer and the composition was thought out. Gotta love spontaneity! :)

lisa said...

Wow!
Poetry is a lot tougher than I thought Margaret, but you write it so beautifully!
Hard to find words for that first photograph, so I am hoping GORGEOUS will do!

I wish you a wonderful day.

Rosie said...

How fantastic, Margaret! Yes, I can smell them - what beauties they are!

Margaret said...

Lisa and Rosie - Thank you. Would you believe this dozen roses only cost $5.99. So, was my husband romantic or thrifty? I guess both! ;)

G-Man said...

Great Triolet!!
I did one for One Shot Wednesday myself..

Margaret said...

G-Man - A Triolet... I popped over to your blog...is that what you call it? hmm. I guess I would call it wonderfully and excellently witty, though! :)

lisaschaos said...

Pink is my favorite color for roses. :0) Beautiful!!