Sunday, November 14, 2010

A Pear's Lament (Take 2) & 56/365

A Pear's Lament (Take Two)
by Margaret Bednar

Succulent, elegant, honey-sweet fruit
Elongated silhouette, global curve.
Aphrodite's prize, kingly gift, honored
Namesake of noble bishops, hallowed Saints.

Fragrantly delicious, white blossomed tree
The of remote Chinese antiquity.
Popularity too swiftly ripens
Usurped by distant cousin, short and squat.

"Unfairly pruned", the grievously laments
Family squabbling now doeth commence.
"Kind John Chapman desired to use my name
Earth's gift to Zeus's bride, and curer am I."

Of same grand rose tree ancestral descent
Flesh of grit versus skin, smooth and shiny.
Supermarket ratings pronounce the truth:
"Statistics do show, "apples float, pears sink."

Each line is 10 syllables, which I think flows better than my first attempt.  I hope this is an improvement.

I am untutored in poetry - How do I use punctuation? for example.  How important is it to have structure?  What is the best way to learn? (I think I know that answer - keep following the blogs :)  My son gave me some advice and encouragement today regarding poetry.  (I visited him at the University and we "did laundry".)  Boy have the tables turned, wasn't it just yesterday that I was teaching him?

This evening two of my girls and I attended a community theatre musical production of "Dirty Rotten Scoundrels".  It is full of nice songs and comical characters!  Steve Martin & Michael Cane star in the movie version.


Carol Blackburn said...

Love this one, Margaret.

Margaret Bednar said...

Carol, and I love your poetry AND art blog! I have only been aware of your photography blog. I have become a follower. (This whole navigation and learning curve of blogging has been a challenge, but, by George, I think I'ms starting to get the hang of it! :)

Patty Ann said...

Love the pic. I think the answer for the poetry is that you have to feel it. What it means, what it says, and what you intended it to be. Some people love structure, some do not. That is the best thing about it. It is up to you to decide. I think it is wonderful. I am always more free when I am writing.

Margaret Bednar said...

Patty Ann, I'm starting to understand that. This applies to poets one enjoys reading. My son is hooked on Yates, and, for the moment, I prefer Rilke.