|Cathedral of St. John the Baptist, Savannah, GA|
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"Dog-eared." That's what a bible
should be (so I've been told one hundred
if not a thousand times), "spine; supple,
yielding favorites, underlined, faded" -
I guess for all to see I'm a good girl.
Each week I watch,
try to come closer to holy.
See some kneel the "lazy man's" way,
butt rests upon the bench, forming
an imperfect triangle
(I always attribute it to being fat).
Momma pinches me if I
even curve my back to stretch,
"Reach tall for Jesus" she whispers.
I used to watch a pretty lady
fidget with her necklace, hair,
twist her diamond ring back and forth -
thought it a new way to pray the rosary.
Copied her motions in church.
Momma pinched me.
Often get sidetracked
admiring beautiful clothes,
wish Momma could look as nice.
Watch as Ms. Fancy Pants puts $1
in the collection basket, Momma $20.
Whisper "Not fair!". Momma pinches me,
says "worry 'bout yourself".
I think I'm starting to understand,
remember Momma says "Holy
is often about not what we do,
but what we don't". So, I'll keep quiet,
maybe sit an arm and finger's length
away from Mamma, not watch "them"
so much anymore, begin to learn
how to "pray guilt away" -
for that's what two women whispered
behind their hands about Momma
as she walked by, and there is no one
I'd rather be more like than my Momma.
by Margaret Bednar, October 11, 2013
This is for Imaginary Garden with Real Toads "Fireblossom Friday - Redemption" One of the options was to write about an imagined character.
Oh the journey to try and figure out what it means to be good, how to be good, and who to emulate. I tried to end it with a misunderstanding (once again) as to what is right. I hint in the last paragraph that the two women are gossiping about "Mama's sins"... but the little girl is really to young to understand.
I'm trying to write a few more "story poems" and they are often clear to me, but then I realize readers don't always follow the way I wanted them to go... alas. :)
I also want to make it clear that I do not think anyone can work (or buy) their way into heaven (I'm a Catholic and that is a HUGE Protestant misunderstanding). So when I say "good" here, it is just a childish understanding of what is expected of them.