Sunday, May 15, 2011

"Opium", A Poem

Photography courtesy of Fee Easton for One Stop Poetry

Opium

A scarlet dream is tempting me
So softly, gently it endures
Of memories, like potpourri
A scarlet dream is tempting me
My past, my love, this cannot be...
Eternally my heart is yours...
A scarlet dream is tempting me
So softly, gently it endures.

By Margaret Bednar, Art Happens, May 15, 2011

This is a triolet poem (at least I think I got the rhythm and form right...)   I very quickly made it up for One Stop Poetry's "One Shoot Sunday Poetry Challenge".  The guest interview was with Fee Easton, a photographer.  Usually only one photo is available, but she left several.  I chose the poppies and hope the poem makes sense.  (I focused on the opiate effect that the oriental poppies have.  The way I understand it, all others are only mildly sedative.)

(After posting this, I realized after reading comments that my "rhythm" was off.  My 2nd and last line used to be: "So softly and gently it lures"...  This rhythm and rhyme stuff is going to kill me!  

With this poem I tried to portray a hallucinatory vision, due to the drugs, of a past love materializing in front of the person's eyes.  Maybe I didn't succeed...  It is funny, because my husband hardly EVER gets any of my poetry and at times I feel like I must be just AWEFUL at this...  (He didn't understand I was referring to drugs, even with the title "Opium")  Granted, he isn't one for poetry nor does he enjoy it.  He was watching the Bulls/Heat game (Bulls won, yeah) while I worked on this.  (I don't really like basketball, but I usually do enjoy the MBA finals a bit).  Oh well, somehow opposites attract :)

I went to see the traveling Broadway musical "HAIR" tonight (a musical about hippies and the 60's) with my daughter (boy, did she get an eyeful).  So this poem fits right in!!  Ha, ha.


And the following is for "Macro Monday".  Click to see other amazing photographs.


14 comments:

haikulovesongs said...

i got it, though i've never actually smoked opium. {isn't that what one does with it?} triolets are HARD and i especially love ~

"A scarlet dream is tempting me"

amazing!
dani

moondustwriter said...

Very well written
Though I've never done it I've counseled enough to know that lure into ecstasy

Ruth said...

This poetic metaphor is reminding me of another poem you wrote about the temptation of a past love. Hmmm. I smell a theme, something to pay attention to in your "personal mythology."

Jinksy said...

How about " A soft and gentle lure"? The rhythm might fit better, as it matches that in your other lines...
And perhaps "My past, my love, this cannot be"...
But I agree, this would mess with the "eternally my heart is yours" rhyme... Triolets can be trying?! :)

Ginnie said...

Isn't it funny when those we're closest to sometimes don't 'get it.' I am learning to not take such things so personally, like when Astrid doesn't like the same movies I do. HA! I love all the things that keep you busy. I honestly don't know how you do it all!

dustus said...

An excellent triolet! smiles. The repetition fits the echoing euphoria of the subject like an idyllic recurrent vision.

Tess Kincaid said...

Beautiful, words and image.

Margaret said...

Thank you, everyone.

Jinksy... I didn't' realize my one line wasn't 8 syllables and I replaced it with your suggestion. Thanks. But the other one that ends with "lure" I do like better but isn't 8 counts. So, to stick with the "dreaded" form, I didn't use that. Structure and Rhyme will be my downfall! :)

Moonduster - same here, I'm pretty much "a glass of wine girl".

Ruth - what I love about writing, for me, is I can let my imagination run wild. I write a lot of fiction... :)

Ginnie - Yes, even after all these years I can't make him agree with me on everything. But that would be boring. ;)

Dustus - I hadn't thought of that exactly, but you are correct. Thanks.

Margaret said...

Jinsky -I had to change the "lure" line after all as I see you were right about the rhythm. !!

Mama Zen said...

Gorgeous poem!

Kala said...

Gorgeous images of the poppies. Love the details in the last shot.

Happy Macro Monday

Linda Makiej said...

Absolutely wonderful macro!!!

Genie said...

Your poppies are lovely... the first shot awesome in its detail, sharpness, and colors. Beautiful captures. I took a shot of a field of them, but I did not get a macro of them. This is lovely photography.

Margaret said...

Mama Zen, Kala, Linda & Genie - Thank you! Poppies are such beautiful flowers - the dramatic color is spellbinding. :)