tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3074509503476824621.post325566449830045110..comments2024-01-11T10:08:36.567-05:00Comments on Of Verse, Poesy & Odes : Magpie Tale #51 "The Brick Wall ", Haiku "Sweet Innocence" 126/365Margarethttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00007201357693227614noreply@blogger.comBlogger33125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3074509503476824621.post-11310321790371935282011-10-19T11:49:53.611-04:002011-10-19T11:49:53.611-04:00so well done and so well expressed you have really...so well done and so well expressed you have really captured this prompt so well pleasure to read<br />http://gatelesspassage.com/2011/10/17/to-my-son/Ann LeFlorehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09421100825301270608noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3074509503476824621.post-53956233623600237872011-10-18T22:46:48.615-04:002011-10-18T22:46:48.615-04:00pleasant piece.
Thanks for linking.pleasant piece.<br />Thanks for linking.Linda Bob Grifins Korbetis Hallhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01546696605935159862noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3074509503476824621.post-33232454403276856982011-10-16T15:31:40.654-04:002011-10-16T15:31:40.654-04:00Morning and Kay - Thank you for visiting and enjoy...Morning and Kay - Thank you for visiting and enjoying my poetry.Margarethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00007201357693227614noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3074509503476824621.post-22467706477887596692011-10-16T08:04:10.942-04:002011-10-16T08:04:10.942-04:00Both poems are quite lovely and such a pleasure to...Both poems are quite lovely and such a pleasure to read. Thank you!Kayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14368539518339009833noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3074509503476824621.post-5726240876427113472011-10-14T15:00:59.814-04:002011-10-14T15:00:59.814-04:00sweet walk and talk, my friend,
Glad to see you a...sweet walk and talk, my friend,<br /><br />Glad to see you at Bluebell Books.Maxwell Mead Williams Robinson Barryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05532576755186051550noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3074509503476824621.post-82152393098990641632011-10-14T15:00:46.988-04:002011-10-14T15:00:46.988-04:00sweet walk and talk, my friend,
Glad to see you a...sweet walk and talk, my friend,<br /><br />Glad to see you at Bluebell Books.Maxwell Mead Williams Robinson Barryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05532576755186051550noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3074509503476824621.post-64479846613455820262011-10-14T15:00:07.031-04:002011-10-14T15:00:07.031-04:00sweet walk and talk, my friend,
Glad to see you a...sweet walk and talk, my friend,<br /><br />Glad to see you at Bluebell Books.Maxwell Mead Williams Robinson Barryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05532576755186051550noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3074509503476824621.post-11359447183865180492011-02-10T08:27:32.478-05:002011-02-10T08:27:32.478-05:00Bumfuzzled! It is OK. I almost used the word and...Bumfuzzled! It is OK. I almost used the word and agree - it is a great word. I have a number of poems I need to go back and massage a bit. Being on a timeframe for challenges sometimes makes me put them out before they are totally done... but the feedback is great. What do you think of the word "afire" being 2 syllables ... "fired" was one. I am now over the six consonant rule... Not sure how important the rules are.... ?Margarethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00007201357693227614noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3074509503476824621.post-10089457724742350902011-02-08T20:39:30.268-05:002011-02-08T20:39:30.268-05:00lol. whoa. boy, did I miss that time, dear margare...lol. whoa. boy, did I miss that time, dear margaret. my bad and my thousand apologies for it. intuition told me look up that word, it's such a nice word *heavy sigh* but. I was thinking of in meaning of unprentious. again. a thousand more apologies :)<br /><br />got better suggestion though, if you'd care to take a second chance :)<br /><br />my heart afire and glowing<br />his brand engraved upon my soul<br />Our passions hot and showing<br /><br />Monty / bumMontyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17446385166445251013noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3074509503476824621.post-87601584829264658302011-02-08T10:27:18.934-05:002011-02-08T10:27:18.934-05:00Ah! I know that "know" is spelled with ...Ah! I know that "know" is spelled with a "k". And my typos above are due to haste, not ignorance... LOLMargarethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00007201357693227614noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3074509503476824621.post-43122560628209479812011-02-08T10:25:24.819-05:002011-02-08T10:25:24.819-05:00Lena - Thank you. I just love brick and I live in...Lena - Thank you. I just love brick and I live in the south now, where so many buildings are brick... I especially love the Charleston's historic district... the buildings are an artist's dream.<br /><br />Bumfuzzled! Thank you for your critique and I love that you took the time. Not greater honor, really, can be said to me right now that you see potential in a poem of mine. :) You have to remember I now very little about the rules of poetry - that is why so much of mine is "free verse" which might just be a lazy way out - amateurish. <br /><br />I like afire much better and had even had that originally! But it makes the line 7 consonants... not 6 - which is the rule. <br /><br />Unseeming means not fit or inappropriate. Not really what I'm trying to convey here... I live the rhythm of it, but will continue to search. I might have to come up with a different ending words... I will give it some more thought. <br /><br />I'm having a tough time with getting -what is it called? the stress to be in the correct place on the first line - is that what you mean? I was thrilled to just get 8-6-8-6, but I need to work on rhythm... It is hard for me to rhyme and do all the rest, ... but I do like the way the ballad is sing - songy.<br /><br />I did make the change above fire ... some rules are meant to be broken, I guess! ;). Again, PLEASE chime in any time! I LOVED the feedback! Thank you so much!Margarethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00007201357693227614noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3074509503476824621.post-10763948759067436732011-02-07T20:10:51.085-05:002011-02-07T20:10:51.085-05:00lol great job, dear lady, and though I said I woul...lol great job, dear lady, and though I said I wouldn't / shouldn't critique here, I've read the many warm comments and your replies. you've got a lot to work with here if you'd care to make the purest ballad from it. you stumbled a bit on the second stanza, think about something like. . .<br /><br />Like the brick wall we leaned against,<br />My heart afire and gleaming,<br />His brand engraved upon my soul,<br />Our passions pure--unseeming<br /><br />suggestions only, and though I said I'd not do it, you've just too much potential here, I couldn't resist temptations :) and first line's still rough on the meter but times it's only thing that works<br /><br />and I'd thank you for responding and for a fine effort :)<br /><br />Monty / bummyMontyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17446385166445251013noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3074509503476824621.post-65196831022720914862011-02-07T17:01:15.518-05:002011-02-07T17:01:15.518-05:00Aaaah! That brick wall made me smile!Aaaah! That brick wall made me smile!Helenahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13447013188405986054noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3074509503476824621.post-16122037610986735332011-02-07T13:51:22.325-05:002011-02-07T13:51:22.325-05:00Repressed - my first attempt at a ballad... it was...Repressed - my first attempt at a ballad... it was hard, but I am pleased with this shaky start! :)<br /><br />JL Dodge - your kind praise is wonderful to my brain. I tend to approach each poem with the attitude "I can't do it". I am following your poetry blog too. Can't wait to read more.<br /><br />Natasha - thanks! But I would love to write a tear jerker "love gone wrong!" :) Stay tuned...Margarethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00007201357693227614noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3074509503476824621.post-71207731152746422592011-02-07T11:23:06.277-05:002011-02-07T11:23:06.277-05:00Indeed, a breath of fresh air as the poem recites ...Indeed, a breath of fresh air as the poem recites positivity and a love done good! The haiku and photo were both also beautiful.Tashtoohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15847190224960829574noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3074509503476824621.post-30712682594191190532011-02-07T11:07:49.135-05:002011-02-07T11:07:49.135-05:00Wow you have a lot going on here !
First off allo...Wow you have a lot going on here ! <br />First off allow me to say that I love the idea of the photographic journey, what a great challenge! I love taking pictures and that sounds like something I would really like to do.<br /><br />Secondly, you are wonderful at poetry, you have a gift and you will find it easier as you go along. We do a propmt a day as well as one stop's challenge, it is a fun way to write.<br /><br />Enjoy <br />JL&BJL Dodgehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12713220952100680871noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3074509503476824621.post-79200637688882585122011-02-07T07:54:54.772-05:002011-02-07T07:54:54.772-05:00Loved your wee ballad there Margaret!Loved your wee ballad there Margaret!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3074509503476824621.post-62774965674191354162011-02-03T22:17:54.915-05:002011-02-03T22:17:54.915-05:00Spacedlaw, Justine, & Tess, Thank you.
Jim ...Spacedlaw, Justine, & Tess, Thank you. <br /><br />Jim Swindle - Thank you for your critique. The rhyming pattern is a ballad - so it is every other line. I was not happy with my choice of simmering to match gleaming - but couldn't for the life of me come up with something. Maybe I will change that line a bit... My main focus was keeping the elements of brick making in the poem - and I'm pretty happy with that. I do need to work on my rhythm and rhyming - Thank you so much for helping me ... I've only been trying to DO poetry for a couple months now and it is really quite challenging... but addicting, too. I like One Stop Poetry - they are a wonderful educational source.Margarethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00007201357693227614noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3074509503476824621.post-84491872129024042932011-02-03T21:02:43.798-05:002011-02-03T21:02:43.798-05:00The urn photo has an interesting combination of ag...The urn photo has an interesting combination of age and life, of curves and rectangles. <br /><br />I enjoyed the poem, but think you could work on the rhythm more. The poem does a really fine job of expressing the mood.Jim Swindlehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13632113399696237695noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3074509503476824621.post-82380930112770128462011-02-03T13:13:25.556-05:002011-02-03T13:13:25.556-05:00Lovely memories!Lovely memories!Tess Kincaidhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04889725786678984293noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3074509503476824621.post-5748531835240670602011-02-03T06:26:50.372-05:002011-02-03T06:26:50.372-05:00fantastic poems and shots.fantastic poems and shots.Justinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14131220171499559949noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3074509503476824621.post-36061724562974898022011-02-03T01:41:04.059-05:002011-02-03T01:41:04.059-05:00Sweet and hot! Well done.Sweet and hot! Well done.spacedlawhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12462723005560128474noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3074509503476824621.post-37237268365565835412011-02-02T22:26:03.611-05:002011-02-02T22:26:03.611-05:00Stafford & Carol - I think next week I will tr...Stafford & Carol - I think next week I will try for a gritty, heartbreaker! But glad you enjoyed this one. :)<br /><br />Rosie & Forgetmenot - Thank you for visiting again and again! I do love my caffeine, but I have a notepad that I scribble thoughts and words in at all times of the day. What else to do when doing laundry and dishes? (I don't watch much tv)<br /><br />Julie Jordan Scott - thank you. I love the idea of your WANTING to soak my words in. How inspiring. <br /><br />Lisa & 120 Socks - The photo is precious, but not one I took. I'm glad you like the haiku - they are fun to do.<br /><br />Uma & Someone Special - thank you! It will be fun reading each others work this month of February.<br /><br />Patty Ann - I didn't start writing poetry until a few months ago. I bet you CAN do this - you have so much to write about! Just try - write thoughts and words unchecked on a page and then go back and select. I bet you would surprise yourself.Margarethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00007201357693227614noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3074509503476824621.post-44217789833427919932011-02-02T21:38:44.577-05:002011-02-02T21:38:44.577-05:00Loved it, Fantastic Haiku and a nice poem for the ...Loved it, Fantastic Haiku and a nice poem for the MagPie.. You rock..<br /><br />Someone is SpecialSomeone is Specialhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16271391140125090742noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3074509503476824621.post-4954622292078461702011-02-02T20:38:04.523-05:002011-02-02T20:38:04.523-05:00Oh, love it! You are so good at this. I really w...Oh, love it! You are so good at this. I really wish that I was too.Pitterle Postingshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02944899733768126383noreply@blogger.com